SEC Football: One silly question for every team headed into Week 3

SEC football has gotten off to an interesting start in 2019, and each week a new set of dumb questions will arise for the conference.

Questions, so many questions about SEC football and the 2019 season. Some have been answered, while new ones seem to pop up every week. Every team has one big question which needs to be answered as Week 3 of the 2019 college football season hits.

In the spirit of Georgia native Al Jaffee’s Snappy Answers to Stupid questions, we give you our SEC version for Week 3.


Can we still lose during a bye week? 

Of course not Vandy, and you’re not losers in our eyes. You’re simply the best tune-up team for every other school in the conference. At least the refs can’t screw you this week.


We can’t lose three straight home games to three straight out-of-conference opponents, can we?

Let’s just focus on the good you’ve done this year. I think this pretty much covers it.


Didn’t we see enough of Mike Bobo when he was at Georgia? Why did we schedule this game?

Yes, the Razorbacks welcome former Georgia offensive coordinator and now Colorado State head coach Mike Bobo to Fayetteville. If you don’t remember, the Bulldogs went 6-1 against Arkansas with Bobo on the staff, scoring an average of 32.5 points per game. If the Rams score even half that much they may still win the game against a struggling Arkansas offense.

Go get ’em, Bacon Bits!

Texas A&M

Is a Clemson hangover still possible against an FCS school?

Don’t ask questions you really don’t want the answer to, Aggies. Hey, at least you’re making money.

South Carolina

Can we pull off the upset of the year against Alabama?

Maybe if the game were happening on Friday the 13th instead of Saturday the 14th you’d have a real shot with some voodoo and chicken-bone mojo. Best of luck anyway.

Hey, at least there’s free water!


We’re good, right? We’ve moved passed Wyoming and we won’t let a cupcake upset our goals, right?

Positive thinking will take you a long way, Tigers. Maybe not all the way to Atlanta, but it’ll get you somewhere. If nothing else, Tim Tebow loves your weight room. That’s gotta count for something, right?


Could we actually beat Florida two years in a row? 

Don’t get ahead of yourselves there, Big Blue Nation. You’ve played Toledo and Eastern Michigan. Just a reminder, that running back — what was his name? Oh yeah, Benny Snell Jr. — isn’t available to shoulder your offense against the Florida defense.

Looks like tickets are still floating around, though.

Ole Miss

Can we just play Arkansas again? 

Nice try, Rebs. I think that’s the wish of every SEC West team the week after they play the Hogs. On the bright side, if you should be upset by Southeastern Louisiana at least your payout to them was under half a million dollars.


Can we start together another 31-year win streak against Kentucky?

That’s right, Gators. Baby steps. Focus on the small goals.

We’ll go ahead and notch a win for the equipment managers for you.


We’re 2-0! Why is no one taking us seriously?

Maybe I should let Funny Maine answer that one.

Mississippi State

We’re 2-0! Why is no one taking us seriously?

Is there an echo in here? Gus…is that you?

No, but seriously, Clanga. You’re playing a 2-0 Big 12 team averaging 50 points per game. Just focus on covering that 7-point spread.

Maybe it’s because your mascot gets too chummy?


Did you see Scott Van Pelt talking about us on SportsCenter?

Yes…yes we did. Good Dawgs. Gooooood Dawgs. #WearPinkForWendy


Don’t you think Joe Burrow is a legitimate Heisman contender?

He’s got Coach O’s vote. What else is there left? Should we just go ahead and present it now?


We don’t need to really worry about South Carolina, do we?

You mean the same way you didn’t worry about Ole Miss in 2015’s Week 3? Oh, sorry. It’s rude to answer a question with a question.

Run da bawl, coach. Run da bawl.

Enjoy the games, SEC football fans. Closing with a quote from Paul Finebaum (via 247 Sports):

“What’s the one thing that Derek Mason can stake claim to right now in his tenure at Vanderbilt? He’s beaten Tennessee. OK, who hasn’t?”

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