SEC football: Renaming some of the best rivalries in the conference

Patrick Queen #8 of the LSU Tigers Tigers, 42-25. (Photo by Alika Jenner/Getty Images)
Patrick Queen #8 of the LSU Tigers Tigers, 42-25. (Photo by Alika Jenner/Getty Images) /
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Alabama Crimson Tide fans (Photo by Donald Page/Getty Images) /

There are a few SEC football rivalries that need new names attached to them.

SEC football is all about tradition, winning, and of course, rivalries. Some of the most intense college football rivalries in the nation are either within the SEC or contain at least one SEC football team.

But let’s face it, some of the nicknames these rivalry games get are just tired, silly, or are in need of an upgrade.

We’ll start with the biggest and baddest SEC football rivalry, and that’s Alabama vs Auburn – The Iron Bowl. A perfect name for this game. It draws an indestructible mental image and is almost an onomatopoeia of the game itself.

Georgia vs Georgia Tech’s Clean, Old-Fashioned Hate can stay as well. If you can work the word hate into a football game name without offending someone, you’re doing it right.

Arkansas vs Missouri in the Battle Line Rivalry is good enough. Likewise for Georgia and Auburn in the Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry.

We can even let the LSU-Ole Miss Magnolia Bowl stand.

But after that, there’s work to be done naming some of these rivalry games.

Alabama vs Tennessee: The Third Saturday in October

Is this really the best we can do? Slapping the calendar date on as the name of the game? Let’s paint a better picture of this one. Besides, with how schedules are being shifted around now that game may not even fall on the same date anymore. How about, One-Sided Streaky Massacre.

After all, the game has been dominated by long winning streaks on both sides.

No?

Both Tennessee and Alabama have some pretty famous whiskeys not called “bourbon” produced by their respective states that check all the boxes to be a bourbon but choose not to celebrate something associated with Kentucky.

Cheers, y’all.

The American Whiskey Bowl